Saturday, March 26, 2011

Am I The Only One?

Is anyone like me?
Don’t worry; this isn’t going to be about how 'special' and 'unique' I am. I wish there were more people just like me, so we could get together over a glass of wine or a cup of coffee and compare notes.

Is anyone else marrying someone who has been married before?

I know second marriages aren’t incredibly uncommon these days, but I am a first time bride with a second time groom. In the first half of my engagement, I haven’t come across anyone in real life in the same position to swap stories with. Blogs or communities for second wives or second marriages aren’t for me because I’m doing this all for the first time. I don’t have wisdom to spout on married life or an ex husband to deconstruct.

Is anyone else entering step parenthood in a situation where the children are a long, long distance away?

Becoming a step mom is daunting enough; adding thousands of miles only complicates the situation. The (online) world of step parenting seems heavily skewed to the ‘blended family’ side of life, and I’m only trying to blend myself in. I have no kids of my own, yet.

Did anyone else reach age twenty-nine without knowing what their dream job or ultimate passion in life was?

Did anyone take eight, yes eight, years to finish college?

Is anyone else still relying on their parents for financial help, while also feeling incredibly unmotivated when it comes to finding a career?

Financial self-help books don’t often mention the ‘problem’ of financial dependence on one’s parents. And job sites rarely have any sage advice for people who have no idea what they are doing or where they want to go.

Does anyone else not feel like a grown-up yet? When is that going to happen?

I feel like I don’t fit in anywhere, and that’s a lonely feeling. Because of my fear of being viewed as “weird” or “different” I’ve realized that I don’t talk about my life. Or I talk about it very selectively, leaving details out that other people won’t understand.

It’s not just about needing advice or help. I’m a reader and a researcher. No matter what stage or phase I am in, I crave information. Graduating college and finding my first job? Google it. Tough break-up or bad roommate situation? Google it. Want a better relationship with my parents, sister, or nephew? Google. Google. Google.

Any time I search for advice on my current positions in life I come up short. I long for similar stories, something that resonates with me personally.

Is there anybody out there like me? Even in a small way? If so, speak up! It would be lovely to have a kindred spirit to talk to.


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